It’s been almost 3 years since I’ve come back into the corporate world after being on my one for 6+ years.
Since coming back to a salaried life, I’m finding that I’m feeling less and less entrepreneurial. As time progresses, every time I think about leaving I feel anxious. And I get more anxious as more time passes.
It’s reached a stage now where I can barely think of the possibility of going back on my own. I have no idea what I will offer as a good or service.
Then I find persons working full time who have fully functioning businesses running outside, and I can’t help but feel angry. Angry firstly because they are taking up a full-time position that can be filled by someone who needs it. Then secondly at myself, who couldn’t even start a business up when that was all I was doing.
Finding these cases doesn’t help me at all to feel confident that I can restart a business. I don’t feel like I have the skill necessary to make a business work anymore.
Bit by bit I feel like I’m losing my edge.
The skills and capabilities that made me want to go out and start my own business. The confidence that I felt that I could make it on my own.
They’re all being whittled away.
Whittled away by lack of successes. Stress and frustrations. The feeling that I’m just not as good or smart as I believed I once was.
And it’s not a good feeling.
I know it’s not true. I’m still the same person I was way back then. But my emotions have played their tricks on me and made me believe otherwise.
It’s still in me to make some moves and get back in business. I’ve just got to find it once more.
Time to sharpen that edge.